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bhikari
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Posted on 12-05-08 10:54
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I made a mistake being roommates with my bestfreinds. We don’t have the same respect for each other we used to after being roommates for this semester. I like to plan my things out, sleep on my own schedule and focused towards my studies and occasionally party J. That’s why we were best friends…. I have job lined up after graduation and want absolutely no compromise on my studies. But they don’t care about studies. He is getting failing grade, but still doesn’t care.. He just drinks and makes noise, turns up volume and I cant sleep.
When I talk to him about turning it down, he does it and then turns it back up again. I don’t know if this is disrespect, but he is always drunk at the situation.. And he goes crazy when he is drunk and listens to no-one.. We have so many arguments on this..
When I talk to him seriously about it, he says sorry, hugs.. and things are normal again, but I know it is not…..
I am sick of moving out because then I would have to buy new stuffs etc etc. I don’t know if anybody is having similar situation, but I am so frustrated and feel like I am the bad person making all the drama all the time. Just wanting to share and some receive feedbacks.
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bhikari
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Posted on 12-05-08 11:31
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well. I do use those expanding spongy thing on my ear when i go to sleep, but the bass is too loud that I cant sleep..Instead of moving out, I want this thing to work out, but I dont know how to.
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tintotopi
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Posted on 12-05-08 11:52
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call cops on him.. dial 911.. i am sure he will be scared... u dont even have to reveal that its you.. just say i am hearing lots of noise in my neighbor hood ...
if he doesnt listen to you, he will definitely listen to cops hehe..
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bhikari
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Posted on 12-05-08 12:13
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nice idea bro, but i am also on the lease, so if we get ticket or arrested, its on both of us..
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kaji sahab
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Posted on 12-05-08 12:54
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ya but dont forget that eventhough u guys r on lease its him who created the havoc so he should be paying for the ticket, not you. make it clear......say that to his face or pay for the sake of friendship being a pussy. sometimes u gotta do what u gotta do... be a man and confront him........dont let someone step on you........if ya let em do that once..they'll get on ur head!
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Aug25,1997
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Posted on 12-05-08 1:12
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I don't know how long you have to stay there with your best friend but I suggest you to manage as much as you can. Don't do anything now and regret later. Your problem seems very common to me. If he was not your best friend, then I would suggest you to move out but that is not the case. Moving out now will definitely hurt your relationship and probably it goes all the way back to Nepal...doesn't it??
Like you are saying you have good job offers so take a good one and move out (I am assuming job offers are not in same town)...
5 years from now, I bet you you'll laugh thinking you guys fought for all these issue. I have seen few cases where good friends share apartment and they fought like enemies and ruined their friendship...
Now, its up to you how you want to take it..!!
Last edited: 05-Dec-08 01:15 PM
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Hari Dai
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Posted on 12-05-08 10:22
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I understand your problem bhikari bro!! I had that problem and that had turned best fren into enemy and we didnot talk to each other for whole one year ,now we have better relation but i am not sure he forgot it all I still remmember bad things that hurt me as well, may i did hurt him as well.There is truth in saying" Jati tadha uti maya gadha".
Bro You should find solution best solution comes from discussion , be patient and not aggressive tell him what you feel i guess he understands that if not then you have to know he is not ur fren ,if it really affects you in terms of long range, beware bro ... think once again!!
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spirit
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Posted on 12-06-08 12:18
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bro cut the power supply at the end of the sterio so he can't fix by himself or break the bass speaker without knowing him.
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spirit
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Posted on 12-06-08 12:18
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bro cut the power cord at the end of the sterio so he can't fix by himself or break the bass speaker without knowing him.
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dipulata
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Posted on 12-06-08 12:36
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Find another friend ..he is not your best friend anymore as he doesnt respect u or try to understand you. I am sure he is not a good friend (esp if he is above 22 yrs old). Also try to change your name from bhikari find some good name so that everyone respects you.
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tamanglakola
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Posted on 12-06-08 1:23
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If you are his real best friend, then try to change his behavior. Drinking and partying and spending money without reason is not the reason why we came to America. If you are a real friend, guide him to the right direction. Tell him you will leave him if he does not change his habit. You have to understand that he is in a serious problem and it is your duty to help him.
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NayaSadak
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Posted on 12-07-08 5:53
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Mr.Tamang , this dude lost his mind and forgot why he is here. He is behaving as the american teens after high school. No one can change any one unless he or she is ready.
So, if i were an american I would have said, F======== him.
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bhikari
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Posted on 12-08-08 8:44
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haha cut the power cord? Why would I cut the power cord on my own stereo :P .. that would be rude..
About making him understand, I tried lots of times, same story all the time.. "yasari ta bhayena yaar, serious hunu paryo, I will understand next time" one day.. next day "padhera matra koi thulo hundaina, life is uncertain, so enjoy every bit" mentality.
I appreciuate your guys feedback, common problem..
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newlynew
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Posted on 12-08-08 9:03
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BhikhariBro: If I were you, I will throw the whole sound system out of the window just to make a point. I have actually done this at one point in my life. Just make sure you don't hit anyone down the street.
If he still does not understand how you feel about the whole drama, it's time to say goodbye to your best friend and move on. Sitting there doing nothing is not an option for you..
Last edited: 08-Dec-08 09:03 AM
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bhikari
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Posted on 12-08-08 9:08
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kaaa bro aafnai soundsystem phalney kura garnubhako !! tyasto OC ma dukha garera kineko maile ;( .
I just have a semester left, aba 1 semester ko lagi pani k khich khich move out garney bhanera matra ho..
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newlynew
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Posted on 12-08-08 9:27
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BhikhariBro: In that case, no offense but you gotta put up or shut up..
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bhikari
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Posted on 12-08-08 9:39
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none taken..but i am just saying I am in dilemma between freindship and saying " i have had enough of your sh!t, so stop taking me from granted"
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newlynew
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Posted on 12-08-08 9:52
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I don't think you need friends like that. Sounds to me like an insensitive and self-centered f..ker. But it's your call..
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sirus_me
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Posted on 12-08-08 10:16
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Bhikari
First of all, dude, I would say that it's a common problem. You can't get room-mates that you want. They are not your wife that would do whatever you want her to do. So you should compromise with him/her. Regarding noise, you can go to other study areas like as library, computer lab. I never study at home.Secondly you are grown up enough to handle this lil issues. If he doesn't shut up, make his lil ass shut up. Shouting here with these lil issues would make you more bhikari aka immature.
Last but not least, Life is not easy. There are other many complex matters to worry about so don't get messed up on this roomies stuff. Get over it. If not, keep on crying like a pu##y.
Peace
Sirus_Me
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ek@l
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Posted on 12-08-08 11:57
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this is common yar.
try to do one thing from next time, never ever stay with ur countrymen.
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syanjali
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Posted on 12-09-08 11:11
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" बिनास काले बिपरित बुद्धि "
अनपढ मुर्ख भन्दा अर्ध सिच्छित महामुर्ख हुन्छन भनेको एही होला।
He must have insurance, ask him to see a psycologist. He needs PROZAC.
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